Statement Of Understanding

Statement of understanding

Her world was not loving, kind, gentle, caring, or nurturing

She was not allowed to become what God designed

She was drugged before birth, abandoned, neglected, abused, and rejected

Yet even those that saw Gods design, did not have the patience to suffer the results of what had been done

They too abandoned her, deepening the hurt and self-loathing

“I deserve this because I’m a bad person.” “I’m unloved because I’m unlovable.” rings in her head

The world reinforces these themes attempting to make them part of her core identity

Statement of hope

The plan of God is not to be undone by this world

Her true design pokes through, ripping at the veil of pain and despair

Surrounded by love, embraced in family, belonging to God

Healing can happen

Mantra of understanding

When she screams she, is screaming at the world for the pain she has felt

When she cries “that’s not fair” she is letting the world know she understands what it has done

When she says “no” she is demanding control from a world that gave her none

Mantra of steadfastness

I will stand as a rock imbedded in the firm foundation of a stream

I will let the rage and screaming run past me, and wash over me

I do not need to resist it or fight back, I need only stand and it will run away


When I am calm, even if she is raging, I will embrace her (or dance if need be)

I will tell her she is loved, wanted, and good

I will sit quietly when words fuel the rage

I will ask her to share her feelings and not judge

When all is calm, I bring her back to where she was

I will engage as if nothing has disrupted the flow

I will allow God’s design to reign

Emulation of Christ

As Christ is my shelter, so shall I be a shelter

A safe place when she is troubled

As Christ is my rock, so shall I be a rock

I will not run away, or abandon my mission to give her a loving permanent family

As Christ is my water, so shall I be water

Fresh and refreshing, a welcomed sight in the heat of her raging feelings

As Christ is my light, so shall I be light

A guide out of the dark places, a beacon to show her the true path

As Christ is my salt, so shall I be salt

Bringing good things in to her life

As Christ is my Savior, so shall I introduce her to Him


Written by John Ala, Ariel’s daddy